Mask
By Clarissa Schroeder
School can be hard. Sometimes, it’s not even classes that stress you out. Maybe people give you strange looks when you’re walking to class. Or maybe they laugh. Sometimes. You wish you weren’t yourself. You wish you could be cool. And maybe you actually hide yourself. Like you have a mask and you slip it on at school. Or you don’t feel that way. You might be positive and happy to be yourself. And you’re perfect. But sometimes, it feels like you want to hide and everybody looks at you like you‘re a burden. But there’s nothing you can do. Sure you can tell your teacher. But sometimes, that doesn’t work. Theirs always a consequence when you do something right. Whenever you see a bug you want to kill it. Sure they die but they annoy you and that’s that. But some people don’t care. But imagine if you were a ant getting crushed by a foot. That’s how I feel. Some little thing can annoy you easily. People always say my name wrong. No matter how many times I tell them, they always say it wrong. But they say it so wrong it’s useless telling them how to say it correctly.
I really like school. Learning specifically. This morning, I dressed up and went to school with my backpack in hand. When I get there, everyone stares. I get endless looks. I never will know why, whether I’m pretty or I’m ugly. But it never will end. When I get to school my teacher gives us a test.
“Any questions?” asks the teacher.
I raise my hand but she calls on someone else who asked the same question I was going to ask. But the teacher looks at me and says,
“Do you have a question?“
Then everybody turns and looks at me. Like I did something wrong. I shook my head and we got our tests. After an hour of testing the bell rings, and everyone gets to lunch. The seventh graders went to a photo shoot and the girls were dressed in their finest dresses. I was rushing to find a table and I tripped over a rock and spilled my milk onto a seventh grader‘s dress. Milk was dripping on the tip of her dress. And all the eyes come to me. I’m like a magnet that can’t pull away. I ran away with tears in my eyes and I hid in the abandoned classroom in the back of the school. No one dares to go there but it‘s my only choice. My friend Lisa came into the room and gave me a hug. Lisa isn’t really my friend, she just says we are and I don’t want to make her sad.
“Check your phone,” said Lisa.
I grabbed out my phone to find a short that blew up on social media. There were over 2,000 comments. Most of them saying, “Lol, that loser.” I tried to report the short but the damage was done. Tears dripped down my face.
“This is so unfair,” I said.
“But it’s so funny!” said Lisa loudly.
She left the room laughing and walked away.
I put on my hoodie and went to the office to ask if I could go home. I just didn’t want to be humiliated and wanted to be home.
When I got away from my school in my mom’s car I took off my mask and broke down.
“I HATE my school!”
“Why?” asked my mom gently.
“You wouldn’t understand.”
When we got home. I screamed into my pillow. I wished I could stay home forever.
-Clarissa Schroeder, Part 1 of Mask.