Miss Meurte
Act 1, Part 1
“Popeyes Drive-through.”
Elliot scrunched her eyebrows, looking over at Sadie. “What?”
“That’s her name.” Sadie tilted her head, from her position lying down on the couch, to nod at the sleeping lump curled under the blanket. “Popeyes Drive-through.”
Elliot sighed. “Sadie, you can’t name a cat Popeyes Drive-through.”
“Why? Not like he’s going to sign up for a job or need a resume or—”
“Sadie.”
Sadie grumbled. “What? It’s not like Popeyes Drive-through is some offensive name or—”
“How would you feel if someone named you Popeyes Drive-through at birth?”
“Elliot, he’s a cat, and an orange one at that. We both know orange cats have less-than-average intelligence. He can barely form a thought. I doubt he’ll care what we name him.”
Elliot scowled. Sadie was the stupidest genius she had ever met. Somehow, somewhere, she always found points to back up her argument.
The silence spoke for itself. Sadie glanced up at her with bright blue eyes and a grin. “Popeyes Drive-through it is!”
Elliot rolled her eyes. “When’s your brother coming again? I don’t know how long I can stand you without someone logical taking over the conversation.”
Suddenly, Sadie’s whole mood shifted, her smile disappearing and some of that twinkle fading from her eyes. “Bane.” She spoke his name like it was poison. “Don’t even get me started on him. He thinks, just because he’s studying to be a lawyer, he knows all the secrets of the universe. Struts around with his chest puffed like he’s a stuffed chicken.”
Elliot winced inwardly. She hadn’t meant to somber the cheerful mood. “Well, I’m sure it can’t be that bad.” From her position with her back to the couch, Elliot looked up, trying in vain to catch Sadie’s eye. “At least your entire family isn’t coming over,” she joked. “You know I can’t stand my aunt.” According to Christmas tradition, Sadie’s family—the Cooks—came over to stay a few days while Elliot’s entire extended family came over as well. Sadie happened to have stayed the day before as well.
Sadie scoffed, finally looking at her. “Lizzie? The one who tried to steal you away at birth when everyone was congratulating your mother to ‘train you—’”
“‘—in the ways of nature,'” they finished together, both grinning. Aunt Lizzie was a crazy plant enthusiast. Actually, that was too weak a term for it. She practically lived among ferns and roses and whatever else was in that hut of a house that called home in the mountains. Before Elliot was born, Benjamin Hamilton had married her, but they divorced for unknown reasons, and supposedly, that’s when Aunt Lizzie went cuckoo crazy.
“It’ll be fun to see the tension at the table when Mr. Hamilton and Lizzie sit on opposite sides of the table, though,” Sadie remarked. She rolled to a sitting position. “‘Pass me the salt, won’t you, Ben?'” she squeaked in a surprisingly accurate imitation of Aunt Lizzie’s high-pitched voice. “‘But make sure it’s sugar-free, oil-free, locally-sourced, preservative-free, Baptized, and blessed with the voice of angels singing a holy harmony.'”
They both fell into a fit of giggles.
“Actually, wait, is she religious?”
“Probably only on full moons and Saturdays.”
Sadie snorted out loud. Elliot grinned.
“It’s not good to make fun of your dear aunt,” Sadie scolded after recovering. “You know, you might actually need her one day to pay off your college debts or something.”
“If she has any money. The only reason she’s still scraping by right now is that Dad is too nice to let his dear sister live broke,” Elliot sighed. “He pays all of her bills and pays someone to bring her groceries twice a month.” Elliot shoved herself onto the couch, letting herself lean against the soft cushions.
Both gazed at the orange kitten, currently snoozing, completely worry-free in the blankets that Elliot had dragged out for him. “Oh, to be a cat,” Sadie said wistfully.
“Especially one called Popeyes Drive-through,” Elliot added.
“Especially,” Sadie agreed.
The newly-named Popeyes Drive-through’s ears flicked. He blinked over large black eyes, deep and full of life. Still half-asleep, he looked over at Elliot, meowed once, very loudly, and crawled to his legs. He stumbled about two steps before falling, giving up, and falling asleep again.
